#84. Read a feminist blog twice a month. http://feministblogs.org/

I feel like the proverbial "ostrich". When I read articles on feminist blogs, I am forced to pull my head out of the sand and acknowledge the millions of little (and huge) ways that women are marginalized, undermined, minimized and manipulated in our culture (both national and global). To read from the feminist view forces me to see those things that I have subconsciously blocked out, because the process of blocking also keeps the anger at bay.

I once read that a woman cannot be a feminist and not be angry. The comment then became part of a class discussion in a course I took entitled "Race, Class and Sex", which focused on how color, income and gender impact everyone, and how certain groups are immune to those impacts. Rich people, white people and men feel the effect of their "condition" the least. And if you happen to be all three, well, life can be a whole lot easier for you than for most.

The discussion about being angry was interesting, as several women in the class were fairly devout Christians and felt that anger was an inappropriate response. Others felt that there is no possible way to counter the centuries-long embedded mindset of patriarchy other than by getting very mad and very active.

My day to day response: sadly and shamefully, I've avoided a great deal of it. Deep down, I know that if I ever allow myself to fully feel and see and acknowledge the injustices, the inequalities, the marginalization and sometimes the horrific treatment that women receive in our patriarchal society, I'm gonna get mad. Real mad. And I'm going to want, ....no, I'm going to NEED to do something about it. And I don't know what that is, yet. And therein lies my path to the sand. Not knowing what I can do makes me feel helpless. And ineffective.

And I am neither of those things.

So, where do I start...?